Breakups are. Not just for those who get dumped, but also for those who have to pluck up the courage to be the one to initiate a breakup. It’s a big and hard decision to make. After all, you’re basically contemplating a major change in your life and you’re also hyper aware that you’re going to hurt the person you love/loved by doing this. No one really wants to cause harm to those we hold dear, but sometimes it is the right thing to do and it the end it will be for the better. Life is weird like that.
In order to help you figure out whether you’re just going through a rough patch or if it’s really time to end things, we came up with a bunch of questions you should ask yourself before breaking up with him. It’ll probably still hurt just the same, but at least you’ll be sure in your knowledge that you’re going the right thing.
1. Is there mutual respect?
Respect is one of the most important things in a relationship. If you don’t respect him, there’s really no reason for being with him. So take a step back and ask yourself whether you respect him and do you feel like he respects you.
2. Do you feel safe?
The fact that your should feel safe is a no-brainer. And we don’t mean just safe in a physical sense, but also on an emotional level. Do you feel safe in sharing your thoughts, opinions, worries and life goals with him, or are you holding back in fear of being judged?
3. Does this relationship bring out the best in you?
No one is perfect and we aren’t always our best self. But think about your time together and figure out if he brings out your best qualities. Do you feel like a nice person when you’re with him, or does he perhaps bring out the negative sides of your personality you would rather stay hidden and forgotten?
4. Do you enjoy having a conversation with him?
Communication is the basis of any relationship. If you have nothing to talk about that you’re not really connecting on a basic level. Do you like talking to him? Or do you usually wreck your brains for a topic of conversation? When you do talk, is it enjoyable, or do you just end up arguing and fighting all the time?