There’s no better feeling that when you’ve found someone to share life’s experiences with, who makes those experiences twice as good. But when you find love, you also have to make sure that you’ve found yourself, and can hold on to your own pre-relationship identity. Holding your own and staying independent is vital – here are some tips that will enhance that ability, and ultimately, your relationship.
1. Spend quality time with your friends and families. Nurture the other relationships in your life, because they’ve been there all along, and a new person you’re giddy about romantically shouldn’t change that.
2. Focus on alone time and have your own hobbies. finding common interests is important, but maintaining a sense of self through other interests can be even more important.
3. Don’t freak out if your significant other doesn’t answer text or call immediately. And don’t constantly be texting or calling each other when you’re apart. Checking in 24/7 can be a bit irritating.
4. Don’t get super jealous. If you feel concerned or worries what the other person is doing, it will breed envy and paranoia. Simple eye contact with a waitress will turn into confrontation and you wanting to be his secret service all the time. No trust issues = better independence.
5. Nurture the solidarity of sisterhood and girl power. go on trips and girls’ nights out, girls’ trips with you friends. Spending time away makes the heart grow fonder.
6. Stand up for yourself! In your relationship and about things that are important to your identity that you don’t want to sacrifice. Speaking up about limits and wants can be a turn-on – staking your ground is always better than just being an agreeable blob.