Relationships can be hard and confusing at times. We don’t have a guidebook or a class at school to teach us how to navigate different stages of communication with a significant other. For the most part we learn as we go and accept things that we like and fight away things that we don’t. We make mistakes and (hopefully) learn from them. There is always someone to give you advice and that is what we are here to do: we are here to make your life a little bit easier. We hope this will help you avoid a couple of nasty fights with your other half.
Agreeing with his opinion on every issue
Girl, stop it. You are in a relationship with this person because on some level you are both interested in discovering each other as humans. Having no opinion on the issues that matter to him will only drive you further away from your man. Be genuinely interested in what he has to say and participate in a conversation. If you agree with his every idea eventually, he is going to feel like he is having a conversation with the guy in the mirror.
Hitting his socials hard
In the age of social media we love showing our lives and in return, stalking everyone else’s. If you are on his profiles constantly trying to see who liked and commented what – you are going to drive yourself and your man insane. Day after day you are going to start to see trouble where trouble doesn’t exist and blow upon your man when his 14-year old third cousin comments ‘Cute!’ on his new profile picture. Have some patience – he will tell you all about his family in time.
Becoming his personal assistant
Now, we all need help sometimes and therefore ask others for it. Do not implant yourself into your SO’s life by taking on all of his daily chores, tasks, and projects. You and we both know that he can probably handle things that he has on his plate. Don’t try and control his every meeting, his schedule, and his workout routine. We also need you to back off with judgement if he is doing things differently than you want him to do. No one likes a noisy know-it-all. Let the man breathe.
Befriending his friend circle
Winning over his friends is a tough job every girl has to deal with when in a new relationship (unless he has no friends. Then you might want to google him again just to make sure you are safe). It is not your job to help his buddy Joe to pick up a shirt for his sister’s wedding or walk with Jack to get his new glasses. Sure, it would be very sweet of you to do but spending a lot of time with his friends might send him a signal that you are not too interested in him! Stay natural and respect his privacy, friend circle, and wishes. It will all fall into place eventually.
Getting him a new wardrobe without him knowing
It is creepy, alright? If you and your guy are at the beginning of a relationship buying him clothes is a little weird and frankly, clingy. What motivates you? You don’t like his style or do you just want to dress him up as a doll and play? Whatever the case is: if you have been on a couple dates it doesn’t matter how beautiful that men’s sweater was. Do not buy it – stay away from the stores!
Being always available
Your life should not stop when you find a boy. Canceling all appointments and making yourself available for him 24/7 might lead to an unhealthy connection that will most likely end up in a painful breakup along the road. Make sure your man is a beautiful and healthy addition to your life – not a replacement. Respect both of your lives and find a balance with the outside world.
Having enough love for two
You might read this and ask what’s so bad about it? Loving someone so deeply can be very energy-consuming which leads to no actual space or time for the other person’s feelings. Respect his space and talk to him about the relationship you are building – don’t just overpower every single day with your constant overbearing love. Meet him in the middle of the ocean of your feelings and enjoy the journey together.
Giving him the power of all the decision-making can cause imbalance
Your relationship may be taking a step back if you give him exclusive rights to making all the decisions! You may be enjoying the ride from a passenger’s seat, and it certainly can look attractive from afar. After awhile the heavy weight of all the decision making for the two of you will most likely lead your man to throw in the white flag and quit. Always try and be an equal partner to your man. Your input is as important as his when it comes to your relationship.
Losing your personality
People who act like chameleons do not do well in healthy relationships. Sure, it may look as bonding at first when you choose to hate from your partner hates and love what your partner loves. A good balance is about the two individuals who equally contribute bits of their personalities and character in order to create a successful future. Be yourself because you know what they say – everybody else is already taken.
Ignoring all the red flags
Sometimes we want to love so hard we close our eyes to obvious things we are not ok with. You want a committed relationship and he wants to be casual. So you agree that casual is totally cool while stepping on your own wishes. It is lonely to be with someone who doesn’t want the same things you do. Communicate with your partner and decide if compromise is at all possible. If not – well, there is plenty of fish in the sea!