Being ghosted is what happens when you’re dating someone, and they suddenly just start ignoring you, completely wiping your existence from their lives without doing the courtesy of letting you know. It’s a pretty rude practice, and there’s been a spike in the amount of ghosting especially with the rise of online dating where people are reduced to left and right swipes. Either way, being on the receiving end of it can be a tolling process, and these are the different stages.
1. The inevitable first stage of denial: maybe he’s sleeping, or just really busy, or maybe he lost/broke his phone coincidentally close to the time he started ignoring my Facebook messages.
2. Maybe I broke my phone. Something must be wrong with my texting? Even though they all say “delivered”?
3. Why have I been on his Facebook looking for clues that don’t exist for the past two hours? *Slowly analyzes every female tagged with him in social media photos*
4. Maybe he’s really into me, and is just playing hard to get. I thought only annoying girls did that. Guess dudes can be annoying too.
5. The slow dawning of acceptance: ok, he has the balls to turn on his read receipts, and all my Facebook messages say “seen” so I guess this is really happening. No freak deaths and no phone in the gutter.
6. I’m not ugly enough for this to happen to me. Am I too pretty for this? I am definitely cuter than him.
7. Did he do this because I’m not pretty enough? Or was it my personality that wasn’t dazzling? *All confidence dissipates and thoughts descend into a flurry of insecurity.*
8. If we run into each other, this is going to be the worst thing ever. Now I need to spend the rest of my life as a single person avoiding this one idiot and needing to wear makeup and my most flattering dress every time I go out so that when I see him, he knows what he’s missing out on.
9. Do I have to go back on Tinder? Dammit. So many gross guys and embarrassing pick up lines to re-experience. Swipe dating often leads to meeting some terrible people, and looks like I already got one who ghosted me so on to the next potentially evil suitor!
10. And the anger starts to wash over the acceptance and insecurity phases. How do I just suck it up and let it go? I deserve an explanation. What kind of monster does this?
11. After sulking for a while, indifference starts to set in. I will never come to an answer, and will never have closure from this stupid experience. Which is kind of a good lesson – learn how to deal with and neutralize situations for your own well-being without being dependent on anyone to do it for you.
12. I will never do this for someone. I have a newfound empathy for guys that I’ve wanted to ditch, because being on the receiving end is pretty messed up.
13. Well, this experience pretty much means that I’m still dope and he’s an ass, so I guess technically it’s a good thing he ghosted me. Because I deserve way better. Confidence levels slowly evening out.
14. It’s ok to get mad, and it’s ok to let it go. But this certainly will help you get back on the market and find someone that knows your value. And in the meanwhile, enjoy that single carefree lifestyle, because it won’t last forever. Dates with pints of ice cream are more exciting anyway.