Long distance relationships aren’t for everyone and they’re usually a lot of work. It’s not as easy as just meeting up with your partner for a date, going to a restaurant or going to see a movie. Oftentimes, people in long distance relationships are on different sides of the planet, so even something as simple as a call takes a lot of planning, because you have to consider each other’s schedule and time differences. These and many other things like the lack of physical closeness, inability to see each, etc. are reasons most people use to not get into a long distance relationship.
1. First thing’s first – you have to trust each other. If there’s no trust, there’s no point in getting into a long distance relationship. There will probably be people in your life who will be skeptical and will try to ruin this for you and that’s hard enough. So don’t play games, don’t keep score and don’t try to see who cares more, you just both have to trust each other that you’re doing your best.
2. Set a goal for yourselves. Long distance relationships need to have a goal in the end. Like a date by which you hope to move in together or at least a date on which you’ll take a trip and visit one another. Otherwise it might seem hard and sort of pointless. But if you actually plan a trip, even if it’s a year in the future, you have something to work towards and something to look forward to.
3. Similarly to planning a trip, you also have to plan date night. Of course, since it’s a long distance relationship you can’t just go on a regular date, but you can schedule a night for a long Skype call where you both dress nice, have dinner, and talk to each other for hours on end.
4. While communication is the most important thing in a long distance relationship – don’t overdo it. You don’t need to text each other constantly. That way you risk boring each other and then having nothing to talk about. Instead, try to portion your communications throughout the week, or throughout the day. Sure, send each other good morning and goodnight texts, but try to save some juicy stories for a time when you can both talk.
5. Try being old fashioned once in awhile and send each other love letters. You might think it’s a bit cheesy, but you’ll definitely appreciate it when you get a handwritten letter in your mailbox. Plus, it’ll make a great memento once you actually move in together.
6. Talk through your issues and don’t avoid fights. It’s important to talk about the difficult things too, and it’s always better to do it face to face, but since you can’t actually meet up – do it via face-time or a Skype video call. Texts can be confusing, you can misinterpret the tone, meaning behind the words, etc. Seeing your partner’s face as you’re talking through some issues will make sure you both know where you stand and there will be less chances of miscommunication since you’ll both see each other’s facial expressions and hear each other’s voices.
7. Find fun ways to spend time together. Watch movies or Youtube videos at the same time, play online games together. It’s a good way to spend time together and not worry about having something to say all the time. Plus, it’s bound to start some fun inside jokes. Reading the same books or listening to the same podcasts is also a great idea. That way you both enjoy something you have in common and it’s bound to spark conversations afterward.
8. And lastly, don’t be afraid to speak up for yourself and make sure your needs are met. If you’re one of those touchy feely people and you find it hard not being able to touch your significant other you might want to ask them to send you something of theirs. It can be their favorite book, or an accessory of some sort. Even something as simple as their T-shirt so you can wear it and feel closer to them might work.