Love is a tricky thing. When we’re blinded by it, we can miss some red flags that let us recognize emotional abuse and a toxic relationship. It’s a cycle that’s tough to break out of, but we’re here to help you recognize those warning signs, and to let you know that you’re better than that, and shouldn’t settle.
You’re experiencing passive aggressive behavior from your partner. Maybe you ask them what’s going on and they say “nothing” but punish you with the silent treatment. Passive aggressive behavior isn’t healthy and doesn’t help resolve conflicts. Gaslighting is an experience of this behavior.
They have almost manic behavior. One second, they’re pushing you away and upset over the smallest thing, and the next, they’re telling you how much they love you and want you to be the future mother of their children. High and low extremes tend to equal toxic.
They make “jokes” that are deprecating or belittling to you but claim that it’s just a joke and you’re being sensitive. This is a red flag that your partner is an emotional bully. Don’t be made to feel like you’re overreacting when you’re not.
You can’t live your life without their consent. You constantly need permission from them, which doesn’t make sense in a mature relationship between two grownups. Big life decisions are one thing, but going out with friends or being alone? That’s some micro managing toxicity right there!
You feel like you’re walking on eggshells, and are paranoid that they might freak out. You hide your phone for fear that they’ll say something about a text, and you don’t have any open lines of communication.
You’re always feeling tired or exhausted for no reason, and it’s not from lack of sleep. Imagine a lifetime of this and nip your relationship in the bud. A healthy relationship should let you feel happy and relaxed most of the time, instead of totally drained.
You feel bad about doing things on your own time, and feel the constant need to attend to your partner and wait on them all the time. This isn’t love – this is crossing the line and losing your individual self and sense of identity.
They never take responsibility, even when they’re in the wrong. Sometimes, everyone needs to be the one to say sorry. If you gently remind them to do something, or the blame falls on them, they refuse to take feedback and instead blame you.
They’re always looking for things to change about you, and compare you to other girls. There’s a way to challenge our partners to be their best selves, and this is not it. If they want to change you, they shouldn’t be with you in the first place.
You find yourself making excuses for bae and his red flags, to you friends and family. This is a sign that maybe you’re missing part of the bigger picture that your loved ones have a better insight on. It’s worth a listen instead of stonewalling them.