There may be no experience in life more nerve-wracking than a first date. What should you say, or do, or even wear? There are so many possibilities and outcomes of the first encounter with someone you like; and it is almost impossible to predict how the chemistry will translate from texts or phone calls to in-person interaction. If you are about to go on a first date, it can be helpful to prepare by knowing what some of the biggest first date pitfalls are — and how to avoid them. To truly see what can go wrong when trying to make a good first impression, check out these 6 things you should never do on a first date.
Don’t show up late.
What time you arrive at your date is the first impression you will make, and is definitely a lasting one. If you show up late, you are almost guaranteed to start your date off with an irritated person looking back at you from across the table. Try easing into small talk with that weighing on your shoulders. You will avoid unnecessary tension and anxiety by showing up early to your date.
Don’t talk about your ex.
Nothing is more off-putting to a potential new romantic partner than hearing you talk about your ex obsessively all night. It can signal to your date that you are not over your ex if you can’t resist talking about them, even when you are sitting right in front of someone new. This can ultimately read that you are emotionally unavailable, and thus unavailable to move forward with a second date.
Don’t be a jerk to your server.
If you think that acting rude or snobbish to the staff will impress your date — and follow through with this notion — you are likely not going to get asked on a second date. Being rude to people who are serving you just implies that you aren’t a nice person, and who would want to get cozy with someone like that? It is also a sure fire way of making your date super uncomfortable.
Don’t look at your phone non-stop.
It’s really important to show your date that you are interested in truly getting to know them on the first date. If you are constantly replying to texts or scrolling Instagram while they are talking, you are essentially telling them that you don’t care about what they have to say — and that you have better things to do than spend time with them.
Don’t be a creep-read the room.
As previously stated, the chemistry between two people can translate differently from online to face to face communication. It is important to feel out how the vibe is between you and your date before assuming they will be comfortable with something based on your previous conversations. It’s best to not come on too strong in the beginning to ensure they feel safe and at ease around you. And if you pick up on signals that say they don’t like your approach, listen to them.
Don’t assume that you are not going to pay for your meal.
In the time we currently live in, gender equality is making strides in meaningful ways — but this also changes the dynamics of situations like who gets the bill at the end of dinner. Even if your date is going to pay for your meal, it is a nice gesture to offer. They may also find it both startling and refreshing if you actually pay for the whole bill, or “go dutch” with them and pay for half.